Tawkin' Turkey - So here it is, American Thanksgiving Weekend. One of the most heavily traveled weekends of the year in the U.S. A time when families gather to break bread, gives thanks and sometimes put the "fun" back in "dysfunctional."

But, of course this past Thursday was just like any other Thursday here in Canada since Thanksgiving here is in October. It was a bit surreal for me, being at work, dealing with clients, colleagues and case managers while trying to squeeze in long distance phone calls to my parents and other relatives before their big tryptophan filled feasts got under way.

This is the first time ever I haven't spent Thanksgiving with my parents. Since I'm still technically on probation at work and, at the moment, my ability to stay in Canada rides on my work permit, taking 2 vacation days wasn't an option I wanted to consider. So, throughout the day I convinced myself it wasn't a huge deal anyway. I mean most of the family is spread around so it would be a really small gathering anyway, much smaller than Christmas. And besides, my mother said don't bother coming home because I was just there 2 weeks ago because of some health issues my dad was having.

But, I have to admit, despite all this rationalizing and how happy I am living with my partner in Canada where I have more rights as a queer person than back in the States, I was definitely aware of my "otherness" in way I haven't been thus far. I think had I been overwhelmed with sadness or loneliness or guilt, I could make sense of that. But instead, I was completely caught off guard by this strange low-level melancholy. You know, that kind of "it ain't easy being green" kind of feeling. It makes sense I would feel this for American Thanksgiving since this is first major U.S. holiday I've experienced which doesn't have a Canadian counterpart close by calendar-wise. Iguess despite all my bitchin' about U.S. politics and "attitudes," teh States will always still feel like home in some not so bad ways too.

On Arrogance - It's no big secret that I'm not a huge fan of the current American administration (or perhaps I should say " 'Merican 'Ministration" to fit in with the times). When I've traveled abroad in the past, I've often tried to distance myself from other American tourists, who are often boorish and embarrassing. Let me tell you there's nothing like watching a bus load of women from Texas descend upon some European gift shop with three poor employees who look as if they are witnessing the Chainsaw Massacre right in front of them.

Anyway, now that I'm living in Canada and am seeing America consistently through a different set of lenses, I find that I'm more abhorred than ever before about how we Americans conduct ourselves in arenas much larger than an unsuspecting boutique.

Here's the latest example which was all over the news recently in Ontario. An American citizen was convicted in Buffalo of a sex crime (apparently he couldn't keep his hands off his 15 year old female students)and was given 3 year probation. However, without checking with Canadian immigration, the man was told by the U.S. judge he could serve his probation in Canada, where is family lives. Gee, that's a little presumptuous isn't it? Can you imagine the uproar if it was the other way around and other countries were wanting to send their convicted sexual predators to the U.S. without asking because they had family?

The man was stopped at the border and given an immigration hearing because it turns out he has permanent residence status in Canada. The person in charge of the hearing went against all the other Canadian officials and let him in (which of course is something the Canadians will have to sort out) but, I still can't believe the audacity of the judge to put this sentencing forward without consulting with the Canadians.

*sigh* Ya know, as of late, when someone up here asks me where I'm from, I taken to saying, "So before I tell you, I'll just say up front, I'm sorry, for everything. I'm American." I just wish those with some political clout could take some ownership too.

Take me out to the hockey match,
Let me push through the crowd.
Buy me some beer and some fattening snacks,
I won't bother to button my slacks.
So it's root, root, root for the home team,
If they lose we'll find someone to blame,
So it's check, slash, skate towards the goal
At the old hockey game!!!

Yeppers, this past weekend for I took part for the first time in perhaps one of the most sacred of all Canadian rituals: going to a hockey game.

Some neighbors down the street gave us tickets to the annual "Legends Match" in which a group of Hockey Hall of Famers (or Hall of Famer quality players) get together and play a hockey game for charity. Apparently it's a really big deal and these folks' careers are folkloric in nature.

Considering I was raised in the NFL/AFL tradition, I suppose I appreciated as much as ble the action on the ice. However, what I found more interesting was watching people and the crowd dynamics.

Now I'm no expert what so ever on sporting events of any kind. I was forced to play in the pep band for high school football games and that's about it. But, from what I could tell there were many of the same elements that you'd expect from sports fans. People dressed in their teams' outfits; lots of beer and opportunities to clog your arteries; and the usual amount of generalized and play specific hootin' and howlin'.

But there were some interesting differences for me. First, on two occasions, complete strangers asked my partner and I to watch their "stuff" while they went foraging for food and/or bathrooms. Dude, seriously, I was flabbergasted. I can't imagine anyone I know living in NY who would ask strangers to look after their expensive coats and cameras. Despite having been here nearly 5 months, the friendliness of Canadians is still unnerving to me (see my July 7, 2006 for some of my early thoughts on this specific topic).

Second, the Canadian organizers of this match included women alongside the men as both players and coaches. It was so empowering to see them out there on the ice as equals with the men and even more empowering to see the number of young girls in the stands wearing hockey jerseys from the pee wee teams they play on.

Third, I'm still thrown off by not always being barraged by homophobia and by being "seen" as a queer person. An older man in his 60's struck up some chit chat with us that ended up with him joking with us about not necking in the bleachers and about how politically correct (or not depending on who you are) the word "dyke" is. THEN! as if having this older man being so comfortable having these kinds of conversations with us wasn't cool enough, the entertainment between periods was the Nylons, a well known gay men's a cappella quartet. Can you imagine this being the half time entertainment at the NFL All Stars Game or the Superbowl?! Man, the responses to that would make the ones to the "Janet incident" look like people just calling in for the Jerry Lewis Telethon.

Election-o-rama - Ahhh, it's that time of year, the leaves have turned all those beautiful hues; there's a chill in the air that let's you know it's time to pull out your favorite sweaters; and neighborhood lawns are festooned with a cornucopia of placards enticing you to vote for Hopeful Candidate X or Incumbent Y.

This is my first year experiencing the election season from both sides of the border. I did my civic duty and registered for an absentee ballot. I haven't missed an election since I turned 18. I figured there are places in the world where people literally have killed for the right to vote and that plenty of my sisters around the world can't vote so why would I throw mine away.

Anyway, The Democrats have won the House and Senate and Toronto is in the midst of a contentious mayoral battle. Although I have discovered that "contentious" and "nasty" political fights north of the border look and feel quite different.

Last weekend I had to unexpectedly travel back to the U.S. because of my dad's ill health so I caught the last few days of pre-election media blitz. Having watched this year's elections unfold in Canada and then being suddenly dumped into the States really made me realize how negative U.S. campaigning is and how little the process has to do with the issues.

In the States, it seems that in the 2 months leading up to election day, the only t.v. ads not related to prescription drugs are some kind of mudslinging diatribe of one sort or another. Candidates search out and exploit (or just outright make up) any flaw or sign of weakness in their opponents. And whether or not it has anything to do with the price of tea in China, never the actual "issues," is not nearly as important as it's ability to create smoke screens, buzz phrases and "politainment."

Here in Canada, to my recollection, I haven't seen one t.v. ad for any of the big races, never mind the small ones. And their idea of a contentious public debate is when one candidate says, "I must strongly disagree with what my opponent says on such-and-such an issue."

What? No trash talking? No diverting to get in a dig or two or avoid having one's own flaws jumped on? An actual discourse on the issues? While this approach makes for poor entertainment, it sure seems to make for better politics.

P.S. I've included on my links list one for an organization, "Democrats Abroad" that provides amazing resources and information to help Americans living outside the U.S. to register to vote if you aren't already and to get signed up for absentee ballots.