Defense mechanisms are such strange things - At moments when we're most overwhelmed, we start playing Jedi minds tricks on ourselves. My big one right now is "compassion fatigue." Don't know if that's the "mechanism" or just merely a "symptom" of my state of mind but it's what's going on and I almost feel bad about it. Almost.

I started having last sessions with clients early last week and I find myself emotionally bottomed out and my office is now one kleenex box less than when the week started. I know I should read all these heavily laden sessions as a "job well done," but dang, when you do 'em back to back 4-5+ days in a row, whew, ya start feeling numb on all levels! Thank gawd for a few close colleagues who've been kind enough to literally let me cry on their shoulders in the moments when I have let myself feel the magnitude of what's going on.

I can't say that one type of person is harder than I another in terms of this "closure" business. Adults, kids, teens, clients, colleagues; they all have their own way of working it through. Some have given me cards or little gifts. A few have just gone through the session as if I wasn't leaving and gave me a minimal reaction at the end. A couple just didn't bother to show for their last session. But, most involved a lot of tears.

They teach you in grad school about doing "closure" in therapy, but how do you do that politically when you're about to become a sorta-kinda, partly by choice, partly by default ex-patriot? Maybe you don't. I'm not quite sure yet. Stay tuned.